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Couples Therapy and Empathy Training
Read Time: 3:07 Couples Therapy offers a unique opportunity to strengthen what is often the most significant relationship of our adult lives. Intimate relationships can be challenging because we all carry some degree of childhood wounds from imperfect parenting. Consciously, we are attracted to each other for one set of reasons while unconsciously
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Mirror, Mirror on the Wall, Which Gender Has the Most Mirror Neurons of All?
Read Time: 1:40 Let’s begin with a simple explanation of mirror neurons. Mirror neurons are brain cells that become active when we observe other people engaging in an action. For example, when we see others experience an emotion by changes in their facial expression and body, our mirror neurons send signals to help
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Empathy’s Role in Survival of the Fittest
Read Time: 0:49 In the past two decades, research has been suggesting people are more soft-wired for sociability, companionship, and relationships than for narcissism, aggression and selfishness. As it turns out, the basic human drive to belong is heavily based upon empathy. When the great tsunami struck Southeast Asia and another struck Japan,
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Empathy for the Self Who Lives Within
Read Time: 2:15 Time for reflection: It’s up to you Dr. Stephen Covey is widely known for his bestselling book, The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People. One of his seven habits is very similar to empathy, the topic for our next series of blogs.He calls that habit “Seek first to understand, then
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A Rich and Full Definition of Empathy
Read Time: 1:44 Time for reflection: As much as you want Of all the Newsletters and Blogs we have written, this one requires more time to take in and understand. It is very difficult to communicate a rich and full description of empathy in just words since empathy is a complex and profound
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Navigating and Regulating Psychological Bandwidth
In case you missed our last Blog Post, the topic was psychological bandwidth. We define it as the amount of intellectual, emotional, physical and spiritual energy we have available to think creatively and make effective decisions. Certain feelings use up a lot of psychological bandwidth. Feelings of loss, betrayal, fear, worry, stress, helplessness or
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Psychological Bandwidth: A Tool to Improve Your Relationship with Money
When I began teaching UCLA Extension in 1976, I had no idea it would be so much fun. I vividly remember how strange it felt parking in the instructor’s lot for the first time instead of the student’s lot. Not only was I teaching my first class ever, I suddenly realized I would be one
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The Financial Returns of Full Empathy vs. Partial Empathy
This is a continuation of our prior Newsletter and series on empathy. Let’s explore the differences between Over-identification and Projection and then summarize the advantages of giving Full Empathy over Partial Empathy. We will use the same brief vignette between you and a friend that we used before to illustrate the differences. Assume your friend
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What’s Your ROI for Reading this Newsletter?
Significant Returns for Full Empathy over Partial Empathy For those of you who may not know, ROI stands for return on investment. In the financial world, this means what percent you make on the money you invest. For example, if you buy a stock for $100 and sell it for $110, your ROI would
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Mirror Neurons on the Wall, Who is the Most Empathic of All?
Mirror Neurons on the Wall, Who is the Most Empathic of All? Gender Differences with Empathy Let’s begin with a simple explanation of mirror neurons. Mirror neurons are brain cells that become active when we observe other people engaging in an action. For example, when we see others experience an emotion, our mirror neurons send
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Why is Warren Buffett Bullish on America?
(Read Time 1:51) Pop quiz: In a 2013 interview in Fortune, Warren Buffett said that: a) “Entrepreneurial spirit and free markets” b) “Low interest rates and an accommodative banking system” c) “Women” are key to why America will do so well economically in the future. The correct answer is C. He believes women are being
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By now, you know me as President of Psychology of Money Consultants and as a clinical psychologist and money and life coach. But something you probably don’t know about me is that as a UCLA student, I was a sportswriter who wrote a column on handicapping horse races for the Daily Bruin. I mention this
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Navigating the Communication Highway
(Read Time: 0:55) There are three basic ways to evaluate a listener’s response for its empathic accuracy: 1) Subtractive (-) responses – What you say is inaccurate. It takes away from what speaker says. The speaker slows down, has to explain what she means, feels interrupted or loses train of thought. Speaker has to expend
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(Read Time: 1:12) Although nonverbal empathy usually communicates more powerfully than verbal empathy, the words a listener mirrors back to the speaker are still vitally important. Here are guidelines for being empathic when you listen to a speaker: Maintain the focus on the speaker (necessary) Focus on mirroring feelings first (crucial for most speakers) Focus
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(Read Time: 1:29) The prior blog showed this man’s facial expression and gestures. Based upon looking at him, what feelings do you sense he is experiencing? One way to discover this is to check in with yourself, and see what you experienced when you looked at his image. Another way is to go with your
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(Read Time 0:48) When we began doing empathy training in 1974, many people didn’t quite know the meaning of empathy. Our simple definition for it is: experiencing another person’s inner world, understanding it and mirroring back its essence in a way the person feels “seen” or “heard.” Scientific studies on empathy reveal nonverbal communication is
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(Read Time: 0:27) We’d like to invite you to the UCLA Extension workshop: Empathy Training: How to Empower Personal, Professional & Financial Relationships Since Dr. Gottfurcht’s dissertation on empathy in the 1970s, he has taught thousands of people how to enhance that skill. His new UCLA program includes the latest training tools, insights and exercises
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Two Keys to Life Success: Prosperity Thinking and…
(Read Time: 0:57) Today, we begin a series of blogs that emphasizes a different and often overlooked area of psychology of money: communication. What do we mean when we say Prosperity Thinking? Prosperity Thinking is when you align your beliefs, expectations, feelings and goals with realistic levels of abundance, optimism and confidence. It includes much
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Why do people behave irrationally with money?
Think About The Kinds Of Behaviors Driven By Money: • People lie and cheat over money – We all know about Bernie Madoff. • People steal and kill over money – Evidence the huge number of financial crimes and murders. • People marry or divorce over money – Think, Ana Nicole Smith, the ex-playboy model
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Avoidance: The Psychological Money Trap We All Use
“Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.” (Mark Twain) Question: Why is procrastination so costly? Answer: Because… A: Time is money. B: Accomplishing priorities increases financial success. C: The early bird gets the worm. D. It causes “learned helplessness” and “down time.” E: All of the above are correct
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